A Postmodern Conversational Murder Mystery

Its very possible that my small (but awesome) Postcard From Mars audience might be "Murder mystery-ied out." Unfortunatley, I am not quite yet. So for the next couple days I'm gonna highlight all the different characters because everybody looked so cool and funny.

Jan Yon Le Pardeau- Writer
Jan comes from an extremely conservative and religious family from the tiny village of
Vichy, France. His parents never allowed him to read anything but the Bible. Dancing, singing and artistic expression of any sort were instruments of Lucifer. Jan ran away from home with a group of traveling gypsies that shared their free-spirited way of life. While traveling he collected many books. This was the beginning of his love affair with literature. With the gypsies he wrote his first novel, “Chasing the Green Fairy: My Time with the Pixies.” And since then he has written many best sellers in France and in the States. Ms. Lily Patricia Noble Sunshine Awesome was so inspired by “Chasing the Green Fairy” that she disappeared for an entire year. When she returned she requested that Jan and her meet and have been friends ever since.

Behavior:
He is crazy, narcotic, and eccentric. He flashes from one mood to the next. He is recovering from substance abuse. He is the pinnacle liberal and randomly goes off on crazy rants about organized religion, especially Islam and other progressive social issues. He occasionally has rage black outs in which he storms off or sits quietly by himself and pouts. But when in a good mood he makes origami cranes for people that actually don’t look anything like cranes.



Ernst Havviener- Aspiring Inventor
Ernst is attending the party as a guest of Mr. Callaway Biggles, a traveling collector of all things bizarre and random. Mr. Biggles is Ernst’s greatest supporter and patron. Ernst will be meeting Ms. Lily Patricia Noble Sunshine Awesome for the first time at the Christmas party. Ernst grew up in Switzerland in the Black Forest. His father was an alchemist who constantly encouraged him to create great inventions. He has since aspired to become the greatest inventor in the “Wuniverse.” He has an inflated idea of his own genius. Above all things Ernst hates Thomas Edison. He is constantly commenting on his resentment towards Edison and his light bulbs. He believes that “there is no happiness where Thomas Edison brings his light bulbs, only darkness!” He wants to create something that he will be remembered for forever but instead he invents things like horse shoes for humans, toilet paper rolls, the marker that makes things invisible, the motorized ice cream cone, and the smokers hat. He also claims that he has created the first cross between a female tiger and a male lion, he has called it the Liger, the new King of the Jungle.

Behavior:
He has a strong and obnoxious Swiss accent. His favorite word is “Wuniverse” He always goes off on crazy rants in German. He is constantly trying to promote his inventions, especially the horse shoe for people which he constantly is forcing people to try on.

Best Christmas Ever?

Christmas Masquerades and Holiday Murders just might have been the coolest thing I’ve ever created and executed. Everybody went completely over the top on their costumes and characters. It was way better than I imagined. Matt and I have the coolest friends.

I was Lily Patricia Noble Sunshine Awesome. I have an eye patch. I was murdered


My whole apartment was lit by candles, we blew up about fifty balloons and old Jazz music was playing. The most exciting part of the night was watching people walk in and seeing the characters we wrote come to life in the most ridiculous way.

Lori was out of control. She was supposed to be really intoxicated and belligerent. She also drew really terrible portraits of everybody. This one was of Jennie.



In the middle of the room Russell, the Islamic extremist Militant Terrorist, prayed to Allah.



Scott won the ski pass for best performance. He was the eccentric and moody French writer. He ran away with the gypsies at a young age and wrote his first book “Chasing the Green Faery: My Time with the Pixies.” He made origami cranes for everyone that looked nothing like cranes.




Kristine was the child prodigy and socially awkward photographer who took all sorts of ridiculous pictures of people. One time she spent ten minutes posing everybody for a group photo then when she had us all perfect she took a picture in the other direction then casually walked off. This was one of her awkward pictures.



Bryce, Ernst the worst inventor in the world, won best costume. He was the murderer and he made everybody try on his horse shoe for humans.



One of the silliest nights.

Check out all the pictures

Christmas Masquerades and Holiday Murders

I’m feeling like this Christmas is going to be all-time. I had my tree up, decorated, all my shopping done and “Ash’s Christmas Mix 2007” playing by December 1st. Every day I wake up, hit play on my Christmas play list, turn Christmas lights on, make a cup of peppermint hot cocoa and open the window to check for snow, a routine I have been carefully crafting for some time.

Having been feeling so overly festive I decided to throw a Christmas party unlike all other Christmas parties. My friend Matt and I have been working on it for a while now. We’re calling it a postmodern conversational murder mystery, which means it’s gonna be awesome. We have spent many late nights creating characters, intricate and tangled webs of plot and connections, scandals, love affairs and twists. It’s pretty elaborate and really funny. We have impressed ourselves with its brilliance!

So far the first set of invitations have gone out. Throughout the week more clues and letters will be sent with more information in regards to their character and background for the party.

I can’t reveal too much except that I am Lily Patricia Noble Sunshine Awesome…. Because it’s my imagined universe and I could have any name I wanted!

Been on a Good Movie Streak!!

Love good films. Not too fond of mediocre films and I get firey hot with anger at bad ones. Love talking about films and since I have a semi-captive audience this will be my occasional podium for discussing my favorites.

This never happens but 10 out of the last 12 movies I’ve seen have been incredible. Here's one of them...



6 Reasons I Loved it:

1. An Unbeatable Duo: There are two, and only two, great things that have come from the state of Missouri: Jesse James and Brad Pitt (don’t anybody try and suggest Wal Mart as the third). Both are in the film.

2. Cinematography: Every shot was a masterpiece of composition, color and originality.

3. My Nomination for Best Supporting Role: One of the best performances I have seen by Casey Affleck, yeah that’s right the Mormon twin in Oceans 11, but true story he was awesome in this film.

4. Jesse James Obsession: Since I saw the old black and white film “Jesse James,” J. James has become one of my favorite American historical figures. It’s strange I realize. Most people think it’s odd in the same way they think it’s odd I find Malcolm X an American Hero. I’m not alone in my infatuation with this thief/ murderer. He stole from banks and trains and was thought to have murderer 15 people but still America loves Jesses James. He’s become apart of American folklore. And Henry Ford has become a great American Coward.

5. Everybody loves Robin Hood: Though Jesse was pretty shady he became a Robin Hood figure. I love Robin Hood and I love vigilantes, especially the wild and crazy western cowboy.

6. Hero’s: Jesse James seems to resurface over and over again in films and books. I think the Jesse James character is what America is missing. We need an American hero. America was once a country of giants now it seems to be made up of cowards.

It was incredible. I wouldn’t recommend it to everybody. It’s dark and violent. And there are no clear heroes and villains. Maybe some people wouldn’t like it, but I loved it.