This is a story about how a glass of Coke ruined my life...

These pictures are deceiving. It doesn’t look like a night in which my life fell apart. It actually looks like were having fun. And we were. Got work off, went to the Roots concert with a bunch of friends. It was so crowded and so funny! Then went to the Pie Pizzeria afterwards with everyone. Started off as the “Funnest Night Ever!!!”



But as this picture was being taken, in all the ruckus, my glass of coke got spilled all over my lap and then into my purse. And consequently, on my phone.



For the next week I was dead to the world. You only exist in this cruel, cold modern day world if you have a cell phone. And I did not so I was a phantom ghost, who didn’t mean anything to anyone.



Verizon, who is a terrible company run by terrible people, tricked me into buying a new phone and then they shipped my phone to Seattle. So I ceased to exist for another four days. Saturday night was an all time low for me as I walked around the lonely streets of Provo at 1:30 AM by myself in a thunderstorm trying to get service.



And that is the story of how a glass of coke ruined my life.

Why So Serious??

All week I’ve been dreaming of costumed super heroes and Heath Ledger. This morning at 9 AM I finally got to watch The Dark Knight at the IMAX. It changed my life. Only one regret, that I didn’t get my friend Stephanie’s 8 yr. old boy Batman costume to wear.



Reasons why this movie was incredible:

1. Heath Ledger. Top Five Favorite performances ever.
2. Favorite line “Either you die a hero or live long enough to become the villain.” (The foreshadowing of Harvey Dent.)
3. The relationship between The Joker and Batman. One couldn’t exist without the other. They are social outcasts. Neither could ever live normal lives and that is the great sacrifice Batman makes.
4. The preview for “Watchmen.” The greatest graphic novel ever written. It’s the only graphic novel in “Time Magazine Top 100 Novels.” Can’t wait for this movie!

Watchmen Trailer http://teaser-trailer.com
by teaser-trailer

Am I the geekiest person you know?

It's a Small Crime...And I've Got No Excuse

No, I realize its a crime posting so many Youtube videos of myself (and then linking my Youtube page in the same sentence). And I really don't have an excuse...uh but here's another one? My friend Drew suggested we cover this:



Not only is Drew incredibly talented but he's stinking funny. Check out his new bloggy blog.

The Life & Times of Harvey Ralph

Mr. Shiny Shoes

I like golf, because I’m an old man. But I don’t really fit into the golfing crowd. I realized this at the driving range recently. I stroll in wearing flip flops and my “Obama for your Mama” T-shirt. I’m dragging my battered golf bag from 1981 past these white, rich Utah Valley republicans strutting around in their collared Tees and shiny shoes, drinking vitamin water. They get a look at my Tee and one guy goes “heh Obama” accompanied by a grumpy old man snort. I arrive at my little golf turf cubical and start swinging away. I have my ear phones in and I’m rocking out to electronic scream-face music, occasionally singing out loud. Since it was the season’s first attempt at golfing, things were surely going to get ugly. But I don’t have much patience for sucking. So I have a rage black out. I kept whacking my clubs into the ground, possibly grumbling profanities. I can’t remember though I blacked out. It would’ve been a funny site if I could’ve been watching from a bush. I just don’t fit the golfers mold.

But what my point of all this hibbity-jibbity hee-haw is, is that I bought a new golf bag today and its pretty slick. That’s really all I wanted to say. I can’t wait for Mr. Shiny Shoes to see me roll by with my new bag.

The Good Times Are Killing Me - M.M.

A pre-fourth celebration. Turned out to be all-time. Lots of funny stories, including one in which I was trying to find something in one of the tents and heard a threatening growl. I took off running like a frantic woman. Screaming “Bear! Bear!” running for my life! I've never run faster. I ran for about 100 yards. Everybody jumped up. “Bear! There’s a Bear! I heard it growl!” Then Brett was like, “It was my dog.” And then I felt stupid.

Ghosts of Overdoses…Not Dust…Blog Entries (and you can die from that too)

Whoa talk about an anxiety attack. No internet for over two weeks. And my cell phone died one day too. I can barely remember the days before cell phones. I can barely remember the days before blogs. I really wish I could though. I should re-prioritize my life, live the hippy dream like I’ve always wanted. Move to India with just a guitar, camera, and a…rug? (Hey Drew). But for now I’m going to overdose the virtual world with blog entrys, Morrison style. And I apologize, but I have a lot of worthless things to litter the world wide web with. Like this…